How to Stay Happy During a Renovation
People say that renovating isn’t for the faint-hearted, but I think that strength comes from going on the journey, and surprising yourself with just how much you can deal with before you have some semblance of how you want to be living. So, in my view, anybody can renovate, but don’t expect to be faint-hearted at the end of it.
Just over a year into my own renovation (and nowhere near the final destination), I’ve come to realise how important it is to enjoy the journey as much as possible. That doesn’t necessarily mean you have to love having a giant hole next to your house, but it could mean choosing to live how you want to live, despite not having the space to match yet.
Here’s what I mean:
Buy the candle, buy the flowers
When we first moved in, we put so many beautiful vases and candles away into storage thinking we didn’t have the right space for them yet. I’ve since come to realise that even if your space is not what you want it to be, that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to light a nice candle in the evening. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t buy yourself some flowers to display. These little mental health boosters actually mean more when you’re constantly looking at a space you don’t really want to see. Doing something as little as buying some flowers for yourself signals to your brain that you’re worthy of them, that your house is worthy of them, despite being a work in progress.
Declutter and organise
This is something we’ve done multiple times since moving in. We moved from a four-bed terrace into this three-bed semi-detached so naturally, we had way more stuff than what this house could reasonably hold. I remember moving day, telling everyone who kept appearing with furniture to just put it in the garage, thinking that space was infinite. It was not, and we ended up with a living room and two bedrooms crammed with all sorts of things that weren’t anywhere near their ideal homes. We’ve since donated and recycled probably a third of our belongings, and honestly, I don’t miss a single one of them. I’ve always struggled to get rid of things, especially if there’s even a whiff of sentimentality, but being forced to sort through my possessions has shown me the benefits to doing so. More space and a clearer mind are better than twenty old train tickets that I don’t even remember using anyway.
Little retreat space
This is something I would recommend time and time again, knowing how important our own little retreat has been to me. For eight months we had nowhere to go that was calming, to our taste, and relaxing. Plus, we had a baby in the middle of that. So, when our bathroom was finally (thereabouts) completed back in November, it brought with it an epic sigh of relief. When everything everywhere else gets a bit too much, we can go into this space and unwind, reminding ourselves that one day, the rest of the house will be as done as this room is. Of course, in true renovator style, there’s still a bit of siliconing to do, and we also need a handle and a lock on the door, but you get the idea. Before we’d got to this point, I admit I actually scheduled time to leave the house and go to my mum and dad’s house just to have a bath. So, having one on tap (pun entirely intended) in my own house, has been absolutely game changing for my mental health during the renovation.
Remember why you took it on
One of my favourite things to do at the moment is, after the kids have gone to bed, stepping outside into the back garden for five minutes. For us, the garden was a big reason we bought this house, so reminding myself of what we have has been so important to me. Over a year after moving in and I still feel lucky to have the garden we do, even though that isn’t exactly how we want it yet either. For months after the baby was born, we slept with the curtains open, and this allowed me to look every single night (multiple times a night, of course), at the view we also bought this house for, my baby in my arms also reminding me who we’re doing this for. Think back to when you first saw your house and what were the clinching factors for you. They’re still there, so make sure you take some moments to enjoy them and remember why you started this journey. It will be worth it.
Look at how far you’ve come
One of my downfalls in this renovation journey is my inability to feel content at where we are. So far, all the work we’ve done has never felt quite good enough, and this is something I am still trying to work on. Ultimately, for us, there’s only one major change in our house since we moved in, and that’s the bathroom. We nearly have a two storey extension next to our house, but we haven’t got a roof or done any of the knock-throughs, so I can’t feel that space yet. But it’s still there, and we’re closer to a finished house than we ever have been, so I’m really trying to remind myself of that. You could also try looking at your depleting bank balance to remember that something must be happening, though this has varying results when it comes to your mental health.
For now, let’s focus on the positives. Look back on old pictures, or even try and find an old listing for your house, and I bet you’ll notice some changes and improvements you’ve made. Even if it is just tidying up a few spaces or adjusting the layout of your furniture. A renovation is made of hundreds of small journeys, from first looking at the house, to moving in with chaos everywhere, to getting your space organised, to building work, to decorating, and everything in between. Each journey is worth celebrating because each one is a milestone to where you will one day be living.
It’s not possible to have a smile on your face all of the time. There will of course be moments. Moments of bad news, moments of worry, moments of stress and wondering how much longer you can do this. But there are also ways forward. Ways to enjoy life as you want to live it, despite the space around you. Find little pockets of joy and snippets that make you smile. Remember what your end goal is and have faith that you will get there. One day might be a long way away, so it’s so important to enjoy as many of these in between moments as you can. Because when you look for them, you’ll realise just how many there are.
